Say Whaaa?

Joaquin Phoenix is seriously walking the line right now. Many are speculating that his recent retirement from acting to his ungraceful debut of rapping, is a hoax. Could he be making a mockumentary? What in the hizzle does he really think he is doing? He made a comment in an interview saying that this rapping thing was just him putting himself out there. Some people may like it and maybe they won't, but he feels the same way about acting. He said that people could look at him in a movie and wonder why in the hell he's playing the role.
Well, Mr. Phoenix, or should I say J. Phoezzie, I urge you to sit back, at a barber shop and take a look at yourself rapping if you seriously aren't joking. Acting is most certainly his calling. I have loved him in everything I have seen him in. He always plays the role perfectly. He was on my Hollywood Hot Guys list. Now look at him. His beard has it's own zip code and his clothes? The beanie? He looks like he stole a homeless guys wardrobe. What is he doing? I really hope this is a joke. I would hate to see someone as talented as he is flush his career down the rap toilet. He wouldn't be the first, nor will he be the last though.

A Seed to Grow On

My sister called me earlier today and can't remember exactly what she said to make me think this but I did.
How cool would it be if the process for getting a house was as simple as buying a seed, planting it and waiting six months for it to grow? It would start out as a nice two bedroom two car garage with a car, and completely furnished. Every time you add onto your family, (i.e. a child) the house grows a brand new completely furnished room to your liking. Also there would never be a gas crisis because all the cars are insanely powerful and completely electric. Kind of like in Back to the Future when Marty's mom puts a quarter sized pizza in the oven and out pops, after about 10 seconds mind you, a delicious family size pizza. I want a seed to plant a house. Oh, not to mention, it would be totally organic.

I'm a Heartless Bitch

I was listening to a radio personality, Dennis Prager. He's conservative and for me full of common sense. I happened to be listening to the Ultimate Issues Hour title "Worshipping Nature". I started to pretty much laugh my ass off because of how ridiculous these people were being. I guess I shouldn't knock it til I've tried it, but come on! So, I started to IM a friend and she sent me the actual video of this extremist group of pantheists with Earth First that Prager had mentioned and of which used clips for his show. Here it is:



Seriously, what has my problem been all these years. I should have known better than to befriend a human instead of that energy filled rock. Oh and for that matter how much more of a heartless bitch could I be. I'm typing on my keyboard that is sitting on, GASP, a WOODEN DESK!!!!!
Now, all I have to say is get a life. Am I the only person here who thinks this is kind of ridiculous? I respect nature in all of it's glory. It's an amazing part of what God created and it houses some of the most beautiful creatures and things on this earth, but like my husband said, worshipping a tree? It's like worshipping seaweed. Seaweed is a plant to and I don't see them worshipping seaweed.
To see a forest fire or a huge chunk of forest lost to a housing development is certainly devastating, but I'm not going to sit a cry my heart out harder for an emotionless tree and lifeless rock than I would for another human being. I get the feeling that human life to these people is just second on the list to their friends the rocks. I use green friendly products, I recycle, take my own bags to the store, buy organic and do the best that I can to live a healthier life all around for myself and the environment, but this is extreme. I could never sit and honestly think that a tree was listening to me. They were created for us. Whatever use they may be for, wether it's shade, a cabin, a pencil or paper, meditation, etc, they were put here for us. Now I certainly don't ever want there to be a day like in Total Recall where we all live on Mars with fans propelling our wind and no trees in sight, but I think I will stick to worshipping in my church and befriending good old fashioned people all the while enjoying instead of mourning over what is actually an abundance of trees on this planet. I will do all of this while at the same time enjoying my computer sitting on my wooden desk. Maybe I really am a heartless beeotch.

I Peed in the Lake

I've been sitting and thinking about what I could write today, or yesterday, or a week ago. I've decided. I will talk about my "I can't pee in the lake" syndrome. Yes. I cannot do it. The last two times I have gone to the lake, I have had to swim to shore and squat in the woods. I constantly get razzed about it, even by my husband. They all make it sound so easy when in fact, aside from wakeboarding, it's the hardest thing I have tried to do.
This past weekend I went to the lake with some friends for an end of the summer/beginning of fall softball season. We had drinks, food, kamikazes going down slides and busting noses and me . . . swimming to shore with my flip flops in hand ready to drown from the mile long swim that Michael Phelps would have mastered in half a second. Believe me, I try. I try so hard I think I might shoot my entire bladder out, but nothing happens. It's almost as if there is zero gravity for my bladder when I'm in water. It just sits and floats. This wasn't a problem when I was 5. Here I am in the woods squatting, with who knows what watching me. Creepy. I begin to make my way back to the boat and once I'm there, struggling for my life to make it in the boat, I decide that I just need more beer, because there is not way in HELL I am swimming back to shore. That's it, beer will certainly help keep my mind off of peeing in the lake and then, I will just do it. Soo, no, that didn't work either. As I am sitting in the boat in pain and not wanting to swim back to shore and look like an even bigger douche than I already am, I realize that everyone is on one side of the pontoon boat and the other boat is anchored on the other side. There is a step and a ladder on the other boat. One of my friends is sitting in the boat and as I begin to make my way to the other boat, she keeps an eye on me.
Now the ladder on this boat pushes into the step. It can come all the way out, or just a little, not dipping into the water. I came up with the clever idea to kind of make it a make shift toilet seat. I pulled the ladder out just enough to where I was sitting above the water. My friend peeks around and says "Anything yet?" Oh, she's onto me. 'Nothing yet'
As she turns away . . . sssssssssssssssss. Awesome! I grab my noodle ( I'm talking about a swimming noodle for you with the dirty mind) and swim away. When I bob my head out of the water, what do I hear but HUGE applause. "LEANNA PEED IN THE LAKE!!!!! WHOO HOOO!" Well, thanks to my make shift toilet and everyone being on the other side of the boat, peeing success was possible. I can guarantee you that it probably will never happen again because I won't have a pontoon boat posing as my bathroom door. I will be swimming to shore, slipping on rocks and living up to my last name.

Thomas Beatie

Looks like this here may be one of probably few controversial issues that I write about. I just read about Thomas Beatie, a pregnant um . . . man who lives in the US. Thomas is expecting a baby girl next month. Now, does anyone else see this as a bit twisted? Yeah yeah, I know that any person can do what they like to their body, but doesn't that just mean piercings, tatoos, boob jobs, penis enlargment, lipo, etc? Those things I can understand, but what this girl , this absolutley gorgeous girl, did to her body because she was in love with another woman and the law where she lived did not allow same sex marriages? I think it is outrageous. Go be in love somewhere else where you don't have to torture your body. Now, I absolutely refuse to call Thomas a man. I don't care how many surgeries, pills or whatever you have had done, if you were born a woman, your ARE a woman. I don't care. People all over are calling her a him. Where are you brains? How do you think it's ok to call her a him. SHE'S HAVING A BABY WITH HER LEFT OVER REPRODUCTIVE ORGANS PEOPLE. SHE ISN'T A MAN! I also believe that having a child is a natural part of what a woman wants, hence the reason she kept her reproductive organs, not what any human being wants.

I am just baffled at how you explain this to a child. Why would any person want to put themselves through this? No matter what sex you change to, your are still going to have the same urges that you would had you never done anything at all. It makes no sense to me. I can't imagine all of the things that this little girl will be ridiculed for and have to go through. What would they have done had it been a boy? I'm not a man, but I doubt that she knows what it is really like to be a man. You can say you are happy and confident in your new sexuality, but you will never truly know. I personally know that once my son, if I have one, hits a certain age I won't know what to do. I won't have the answers to his questions or know how to handle certain situations for him. I will get uncomfortable giving him a bath after a certain age. I know there are plenty of single moms out there who manage but I am glad that I have a husband who will be able to help me through this. Wouldn't it have just been easier to move to a state where it was allowed and then deal with that instead. I think its a lot harder for a child to understand a sex change than two mommies or daddies.

Before I end, let's get one thing straight just incase I get a few harsh words. I have a few friends involved with another of the same sex and I still love them. I absolutely do not agree with their lifestyle, but that does not change the person that I have grown to love and trust. Things like this are based on opinions and beliefs and my beliefs are with God. There is a level of respect that should be paid to all people you know and their beliefs. My beliefs are that you can love another man if you are a man, or another woman if you are a woman, but you cannot lay with them like you would your spouse of the opposite sex. Changing your entire body is just completely out of line. I believe that marriage is a sacred thing only to be exchanged between a man and a woman . . . with all the proper organs they had from birth.